Its not just you!

Im a bit lost right now. I am. In many ways. Maybe i need someone to hold my hands and guide me thru the dark tunnel. Somehwere i can just lean my head on without any worries, frights or uncertainties, where future can be so solid and clear,that i can close my eyes and hold your hands in peace. A place that im looking forward to.

I see many possibilities out there. I am tired of the feelings. So i stopped feeling it. Im making it as invisible and as unimportant as possible. But when the sun goes down and when i can only hear the crickets, feelings bcome solid.

I just wished it didnt go this way. I just wish ...........................................

They say life's like u using ur palms holding the sand. When u want it so badly and didnt want to let it go, u grab the sand with all your might, and as a result, more sand will fell from ur palm and ure losing most of it. But if u can just try to loosen things up and not holding onto something so badly, u will find that most of the sand is still in your hands.

Im stalking someone;s blog. Its damn awesome.

:P

Ps/ I somehow feel this blog is a bit too public. Lol. Wtheck.

Pps. Suddnely i dont feel like going to the trip, instead i just wanna stay at home and think about stuffs.

Ppps. Sometimes, i just need some time alone, undisturbed. Im kinda tired to keep up with ppl. I cant always be there answering questions u know. I just need time ALone.

Lifes effing hard man.

And no matter how hard it is. WE still eat Mcd. Thats weird rite. Gowd, im going nuts.

Signing off!

The Sky and The Rain

This is what i get from someone's blog. Which i really felt that its very meaningful and touching.

Its was originally written in chinese. So yeah, after I, me, AKU translated it, maybe it will sound a lil weird.

" The blue sky, will always let the rain droplets fall heavily down to the land.

The rain then leaves the sky.

But, because of the love and faithfulness, the rain, will always silently return to the sky, back to its side.

The rain, understands the beauty of the sky.

But the sky, never gets the love of the rain"

Its just not easy to be the rain sometimes. Its kinda sickening to always play the rain's role. U get me? Do u?

Ok, lets talk again.

Okay, i know i know. Its long since i last blogged. Well, work really keeps me busy, realy busy, so cant blame me laaa. Jior. Lol

So yeah, ive worked in adidas bukit raja aka ADBR for quite some time now. A really long time for me though. Three and a half months, thats long,like longer than NS. So its pretty normal for me to get pretty close with my colleagues now. Too close that sometimes i felt its kinda impossible for me to leave them, to leave the shop, to leave evrything behind and move on. At times, i even feel lazy to move on to another level, to U to somewhere which is totally new to me. Like u know, whats wrong with just staying there and work?! I know, i got kinda insane didnt I? Dont worry, i will still move on, no matter how hard it gets. :D

So My supervisor, or maybe we just call him Yao. Ok, he is actually one year younger than i do, oh yea, so much of a supervisor huh?! Lol. When i first met him, wow, he totally scares me. Well, after getting to know him for so long, he is just another kid. Lol. THOUGH, i kinda disagree with his way of umm 'ruling' the outlet at times, despite evrything, i cuden deny that he do care for his staffs, unlike other supervisor who are more umm, inhuman and all. He had mood swings at times, and gosh, i HATE mood swings. But other than that, he is one damn playful and funny supervisor.And of cors i get to know wenying and chinyee. Lol. Chin yee just cant stop making me luff, he can do it like effortlessly. Which is kinda annoying at times, i mean , do u know it requires plenty of energy to just LAUGH? Lol. They were pretty cool to work with. They makes work fun, its just like a hang out u know, evryday i go to work.

AND talking about work, like the real work, i get to know ADIDAS a whole lot more, and of course, customer service. Like seriously, those promoter or sales assistant are the most cunning living things on earth. To get the stuffs sold, trust me, we say a lot of weird things. LOL. Like really weird things to just get them buy the stuffs. Lol.

And im so into my job that I even feel the responsibility to increase the daily sales of the outlet. NO, thats not my job, yao's job, but u know, to help him out and all, im actually kinda tensed up whenever the sales was low and all. Im like possessed, aint I? Lol :P

* My english really degrade a lot huh?! Do u realise that? Lol

And yeah, im leaving them real soon. I need to do this no matter how reluctant i am. Its just a matter of time. Good times dont last forever, nahh it doesnt. However, I will keep the moments with them forever in my mind, though maybe they say after that we should keep in touch and those typical words, deep inside, i knew there will be a difference after i quit. Its hard to keep up after evryone goes their own way. Thats just how we deal with life i supposed.

ok Done with work. What else?! Hmm, oh yea, i am actually pretty messed-up now. Like really messed-up, in all and ervy single aspect. Trust me, im in pretty deep shit now.

1) I still dont know what to study. IMU or whatever shit? I DONT KNOW. And i will just keep on use the reason ," Gotta wait for the UPU's result to be out in the mid of june", yea, that definitely makes me feel better, to avoid to face all this mess, like really. ITS A MESS.

* I really hate going to school to certify stuffs.

2) Ok, this is definitely not academically-related. Im actually very confused with my actions at times. Im doing something really dumb, Like even cows wont do it. AND YET, im doing it. When i get closer to someone, i will actually...do pretty much evrything for them, and of cors, NOT EVERYONE. Im not that noble ok. And when it turns out to be doing for zero reasons, seriously, i felt like dieing in the bed and die again and then DIE again. Well if u get me.

3) One friend came to me the other day. He says he needs a gurlfren like Immediately to just cure his own loneliness. I didnt really say much thing that day to him. I just smiled and said WHAT! Lol. Of cors i get how he feels. Who doesnt get that before. But the most important part is how do u cure ur own loneliness. Or how do u interpret ur own loneliness. If u get what i mean. These few months, i saw many examples. Some, i really felt the other party need somebody's company and hence, they need to find a partner, like no matter what. Im kinda sick with all this la man, Haiyoooyooo.

4) I really miss Valerie Oon and Mellissa Lee. Love u guys. :D

Im going for trip soon. Like a seven days trip. LOL. I cant wait mannn. I really need some fresh air after working in there for SOOOOOOOOOO long. Its time to feel the sand and touch the sea water. Gosh. woooohooooo.

PS * Im a pretty meessed-up person myself. So, no, i cant do the right actions at the right time. I avoid at times. But dont worry, when i finally cleared my mind and know what to do, i will do the right thing. Give me time.

* I like eating alone when im having my break times. It just feel awesome. :D

Nites world. My new skin is awesome-cute-ness.

love,

fuiteng