The fear. In me.

I.M.U

So oh yea, as u guys know, im now already in IMU, taking up pharmacy, my so called dream since secondary school which i tot i will never achieve. And see, here i am. And guess what, i m not that contented anyway. I m not sure its because of me myself or what, i just dont feel fine. I mean like things are getting better, as we humans, adapt almost to anything. Adapting is taking its place and its going well. But still. Its really different from what ive expected maybe. friends play a great role in making something fun, and thats what i have none here. Dont get me wrong, of cors i have frens here, frens, hmm, but u know, i need like the frens that i used to have back in Klg. Now even when im back to klang they werent there, some in pahang and stuff, some were practically depressed and busy themselves and all. Haih. Lol, seriously its not that bad, But haih, my exaggeratism is getting WORSE, well if that word exist.

People in IMU

And in IMU, u see, when u get to uni, u will get the second chance to be anonymous again, its nice to be anonymous, like forming a brand new u. Hmm how shud i put this?! Umm, its like u will see different bunch of ppl if u just sit still and start listening and looking. Some who really act/are smart, some who are quiet but smart, some who doesnt care a thing, some who care about boys ONLY and hate being single, some who are noisy smart or noisy not smart, some trying to get more attention, some depressed kid, lol, some WHOM I NEVER see in my 5 weeks here before suddenly pops up. Well u cant blame me, 156 is like A LOT to remmeber and recognize. And of cors there are many who are still anonymous. U can see, u can tell. And, seriously, some u wud just wish to ignore and stab them to death. HAHAHHAHHAH. Shit, im getting worse. So my progress, is that, i m still my quiet self, i admit i did open up a bit, ok A LOT. At least i get to know some frens, like some who INVADE ppl's laptop to get her blog's link and stuff. Lol. If that dude is reading this. *bubba gump* *yums*

Life in IMU

Maybe its the stress from exam or some sort. I need astro BADLY. Its really boring here, and if i still have to NERD at home in the weekends, trust me, my days are numbered. U practically can do nothing much here in Imu, except dancing, the only thing im INTO. I wanted cheerleading too, but i didnt want to die so early so i forgo that one. And besides that, nothing much. And my hsemates study like almost evry second. OK that scares me. U know when i m back at home, my own HOME, no stress, only warmth and love. Here, no warmth, no love, no food. See!

HOUSEMATES in Vista

Oh well,to compare with others, im actually quite lucky to get this unit. I stay in a room, all by myself, and of cors the rent is higher but the money is for the privacy actually. Mummy say i will die if i share a room with others, which kinda makes sense now. Even to stay in a house with others, its not easy. Im serious. Ure going thru daily life with ppl uve just known, what do you expect. It requires lotsa of tolerance and thats what i lack of. Im learning but give me time. And chores in the hostel house is the worst, who do which, who have done more. Sometimes, do u think ppl care? When i have a bad day and an exam coming, seriously, all i want to do is just to bang the door until it crumbles down, FUYOHH. Lol. Its not that hard, but it does bothers you in life, get my idea?! And sometimes, u will just wan to lock the room and listen to Coldplay.

Exams and studies

I miss white boards. I miss mrchan;s maths class. I miss school. I miss the teachers who treat us like kids.

Lecturers in UNI treat us liek some useless trash, yes, thats what i feel. There isnt any connection AT ALL. NONE. My maths lecturer act like he has major depression or somesort. He talks to himself, ONLY. I mean he is not bad in teaching la, if u listen, but that kinda class really isnt interesting, at ALL. ANd mmy life get worse with lecturers liek this. Haih.

Its really not that bad, but still......

Maybe im just too bored. :(